TELLING OUR STORY

TriedEver felt completely drained, depleted, exhausted, sapped and completely empty with nothing left to give? Not to yourself or anyone else? Pushed, pulled, torn apart, pressed and bent in all kinds of directions? Challenge upon challenge that is deeply personal, wiping you out, leaving a fatigued, bruised, angry and empty self?

We all respond to challenges and pain in our own unique way. Mostly, I myself and many I notice around me, have suppressed, stuffed down and repressed deep inside that which we do not know how to deal with.  Most noticeably this can be child hood trauma, all sorts of abuse, bullying, death and dying, divorce, moving home and the stress of living life.

Throughout my journey of becoming more consciously aware of life, the stories I carry, the experiences that challenge me, the patterns I have formed, have all been dealt with in many ways, from Dynamic Meditation, being in silence for three months, writing journals, dancing, being very vocal and angry and getting nowhere it seems. Stuff, always arises.  Situations emerge.  Something or somebody will trigger anger.

I am very aware that this uncovering of oneself is a never ending journey.  There is no end of the road. Being open and willing to delve, probe, explore and enquire into the dark chasm within requires some resilience.

It has become more and more apparent as stories and experiences have left their mark on me that I need to find an ongoing way for them to be expunged. That I need to cleanse myself of the toxicity that has built up over the years, within my body and wellbeing, on so many levels.

So, instead of verbally telling my story, I write. Expunge, empty, drain and attempt to clear, the hurt, the pain, the fear, the rage, the anger, the torment, the distress.

I write (mostly in long hand) pages and pages, of my story. There are many of them. Some of the writing is in the form of anger letters directed at specific people.  Sometimes it is anger towards myself.  None of this writing is for keeping.  It is a way to empty the chamber pot.  The places inside where toxic, contaminated thoughts, belief and monkey mind have wielded their power for years.  It is not necessary to get everything out in one hit.  I write, stop, read back and continue with mounting energy driving myself to expel more and more of whatever it is that causing me upset at the time.  It is cathartic. Then

emptying the inner chamber pot and offering back to Source

emptying the inner chamber pot and offering back to Source

I destroy the writing, in a ritualistic burning ceremony offering the words, feelings and emotion on that paper, up to Source, to absolve and allow Joy to restore itself within my being.

This is an ongoing process. It is cathartic, yet also challenging.  It is amazing what is hidden in the depths of one’s being. When one thing arises, it often leads to something else that needs to be cleared.  The writing is the energy that supports me in becoming healthy, strong and successful again. The energy that gives me the ability to return to my original, or better, self than I was before!

When I can write a love letter to myself, and mean what I write, then I know I will have arrived at that place of enlightenment.

AND there will always be the need to keep emptying the chamber pot.  Life is like that. Always giving you more!

Mollycoddling – What’s at stake?

Being a parent is a really tough job. There is no right or wrong way.  There simply is no training in book form or in the upbringing that one self has, that prepares you for the day you too, become a parent.

manchild 3I feel my daughter is a much better mother than I was. Even so, circumstances are different and times have changed. She was almost fifteen years old when she left home and yes, I was instrumental in her departure. She was choosing her anger and drug use along with a delinquent lifestyle over school and the security of life at home.  It was the hardest and most heart breaking decision I have ever had to make. It hurt and pained me beyond words. The only way I managed to do that was with the support of very dear and profoundly wise friends.

She came good and is herself now a parent of two.  I have watched her commit to not being the same style of parent I was. Thank goodness!  I never knew what I was doing anyway.  It was simply trial and error and bouncing along doing the best I could.

I have had to learn to stay out of her business (at times, failed horribly). I have been the onlooker for many years.  I have been witness to the excessive Christmases. I have witnessed grandchildren never want for anything. I have witnessed the onset of the social media circus. The absolute ‘buy or die’ need to have the latest iPhone. How essential it is to a kid’s life to view the latest Instagram, Snapchat or Facebook message, continually.  Maybe that goes for many adults too.

I have also come to the conclusion that you really can do too much for your children and inhibit their growth of independence, self reliance and self responsibility. Molly coddling or babying your children is a recipe for disaster, so is giving them everything they want.

This comes in many guises. Referring to your offspring as “your babies”, “your little boy”, “your princess”, even when they have become young adults. By not showing them how to clean up after themselves, keep their rooms clean, hang out washing, empty a dishwasher, cook or even know that an empty toilet roll goes in the rubbish, not on the floor, is not doing anyone any favours. How we make a rod for our own backs!

What is often overlooked is the fact that each family member has feelings and the innate desire to be respected, heard and seen. Yes! Even children! How often do we honour each other in this way?  This is a skill learned at home and affects our relationships in the outer world with friends, relatives, school teachers and the person serving you at the shops to name a few.

Do everything for your kids?

manchild4You will finish up with thanklessness, verbal abuse, complete disrespect, and a big dose of disdain chucked in for good measure, (probably directed at you from over the top of an iPhone screen).

Sadly, I have come to the conclusion that fundamental life skills are lacking in the over protected.  They get to become adults without knowing how to be one.

Oh yes.  Becoming a parent was never meant to be easy. You just can’t stop being one either. There is no Off switch. By the way I am not perfect either!

GOOD NEWS – WANTED

Olympics

As I look and listen to what’s going on around the world, I find myself wringing my hands in despair. I am not an avid news reader or watcher, however, no matter who your friends, workmates or acquaintances are, most are ready to say “ Did you hear about…..?” Usually, these people are referring to […]

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I AM WELL AND TRULY TRUMPED!

Trump

The strangest most dysfunctional thing that is happening in the world, at the moment, has without doubt, to be the American elections. Has it occurred to you, that what you are seeing right now is a change of world consciousness? It couldn’t be clearer! What human beings are seeing on their TV’s is that what […]

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WORLD REFUGEE CRISIS

child refugee

Let’s review the refugee crisis. A few months ago pictures of dead children on a beach galvanised the planet into outrage and a show of compassion that was loud and vocal.  Then for a moment, just a moment, the leaders on the planet came together and looked at how they could play their part in […]

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What does 11:11 mean to you?

1111-alarm-clock

Most days I glance at the clock, or my phone and see 11:11 staring back at me.  I notice Facebook Posts with the time of 11:11 when posted, text messages I receive with the time of 11:11, emails too.  I recall being told (or reading somewhere) that it was ‘Source Energy giving you a loving […]

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How Death Can Be

Wayne-Dyer

Even though there is no such thing AS WE KNOW IT as Death… I had to post this tribute of Wayne Dyer’s daughter Saje.  If only, daughters, loved ones, EVERY son and daughter (in general) were brought up to KNOW from through their parents and through their inner self, that when a parent makes their […]

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See you on the other side Wayne Dyer

A motivator extraordinaire

I remember my first Spiritual Conference in Perth, Western Australia more than 22 years ago where Wayne Dyer, Deepak Chopra, Louise Hay and Stuart Wilde were all part of the line up. I have never forgotten that Conference, as Stuart Wilde was so irreverent he had people walking out by the dozen.  I was in […]

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The Word

Dr Laura

On her radio show, around 2004, Dr. Laura said that, as an observant Orthodox Jew, homosexuality is an abomination according to Leviticus 18:22, and cannot be condoned under any circumstance. The following response is an open letter to Dr. Schlesinger, written by a US man, and posted on the Internet. It’s funny, as well as […]

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I too am on TEAM HUMAN

Zaky Mallah

This is a comment by a man called Ken Morris with regard to the furor surrounding Zaky Mullah’s appearance on the ABC’s Q&A last week: I totally support Ken Morris’s view and certainly uphold the fact that I have a strong desire for our Government and the Media to take a long look at the […]

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