“Sex is supposed to make me feel better!”
If we believe this—as all too many do—we easily can get quite driven about having it regularly. But why should sex have to make us feel better?
What if we came to sex already happy, already relaxed, already open and loving and energized, instead of expecting sex to produce all this for us?
We need to stop assigning our sexuality to slave labor in the sweatshops of our neuroses and unaddressed needs!
If we, for example, are tense or anxious or insecure, why should sex have to be an outlet for our tension or anxiety or insecurity?
Only when we release sex—and everything else!—from the obligation to make us feel better, will we start to feel truly better.
-Robert Augustus Masters